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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 16, 2008 9:27am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

I want to be the marsha brady of this forum! Look at my witty subject lines and ghasp at my viewed and replied stats, which I probably save in excell and print out as wall paper so if anyone ever comes to my house they would see how popular I really am and how I am somehow responsible for someone else's band 40 years ago. I have to keep it alive, day in and day out. This image of omnipotent gaurdian of the sacred flame. I may use many names but I am the same person everywhere you go. I was at that party, remember? I had to be in the spotlight, although my routine was borrowed from other comedians. Like a DJ pretending to be an artist or a musician because they can sequentially arrange related songs and are physically attractive enough to look cool in a black mesh shirt swinging a glow stick. Or how about the guy with all the books, not only has he read them all but he has some divine connection to the author. Idol brokers, role model middle men, false messiahs, empty vessels of other's knowledge. My talent does not lie in creating my own original art, I spotlight others' works and point it out with a holy condesension as if me knowing that tidbit made me closer to the creator, the artist, the scene.

I could have taken that talent of regurgitation without interpretation and made a decent high school teacher. I am too angry to be too liberal and with the challenges from curious minds would always lead to physical confrontation because my confidence in my own viewpoint is low. Instead I will wind up in a mediocre job, most likely graveyard shifts and with fairly limited personal contact because that is my achilles tendon... interpersonal communication.

I want you, no, I need you to read my posts. You complete me even though the posts are not about me, I know you would not want to see the real me. I will put on a show and make you like me, regardless of how vile and immature I can be. When someone comes along into my cave and posts links of their own music that they had the energy, ability and time to donate to the world as a form of expression of their intellect, philosophy and dreams, I take offense.

It's like having van halen open for blink 182. My emtpy cardboard existence is flammable when a creative spark archs across my lab table. My voltmeter spikes and I must retaliate. This is my audience, not the bands audience. These are not soundboards, these are "meboards" you must ignore those making their own path in life and watch me fan a burning ember that blazed out long ago that I didn't light. My eyebrows were singed, but the fire never made it inside to burn away the hatred.

I have a bit of intelligence but my emotional handicap prevents me from rational thought and deate. I know enough to be dangerous and mailicious but my own anger and hatred are my biggest enemies, not the imagined threats from outside my sphere of comfort. Some of you know what I am, some of you even accept it because, "hell his stupid newfangled stuff don't belong here", some of you curse me but most of you accept me and that keeps me from lashing out. If it looks like I might not be allowed to dominate the the rap jack, I show signs immediatly revealing my true character. Envious shrieks of rage like the theme from psyho echo in my aging ears, the higher frequecies don't bother me much these days.

I complain that the new crowd ruined my scene, it was my scene. I had every right to keep those other thousands of people from enjoying it the way they were raised by my own generation to enjoy it. I don't understand why the younger generations are out of control when I made sure my friends and I did not oppress them growing up and left a carefree no worries world for them to ignore while they tune in, turn on, and shoot up heroin.

I really judge people on not knowing a certain version of a live song from before they were born and truly believe an mp3 is a valid presentation of a deadshow experience. Yeah for a blind person without taste and scent organs, aside from it not being in 3d and including your friends asking you for a light, it is. But I am shocked and amazed when someone doesn't see things exactly my way. It's almost like we grew up in different houses at different times in different climates and situtations, but that can't be because I am you and you are me and we are all together right? One big family with me as your adopted big brother now that daddy is gone.

I scorn studio music because people went to every possible process in a controlled environment to make it sound good on your car stereo, your headphones and your home hifi. Even though most "studio" work is technically live... everytime I, if I did make my own music, record a track, that track is live, the musicians are me on the other track or another musician, the vibe is the same, for me, maybe not for you. As observers we think of live as audience and no audience. What about improvising, recording multiple tracks at the same time, recording in front of an audience in a sound room? Is it the crowd? Is the energy of the musician from the crowd? What makes live music "live". The rawness? The randomness in sound levels? The anything can happen element? These are all subjective and relative but I must cram down your throat definitions and rules to regulate your thoughts and opinions to be like mine or I will cast you out.

I am like the jehovahs witness who knocks at your door at 8 in the morning on your day off and tells you only 100 thousand are getting in to heaven. You mean you are competing against yourself? Yes I am. I want people to know about my favorite band but new people you better like the right songs and setlists, covers and trivia, shirt lists and sock chart, od timelines and warm beer memories as me or you shall be cast into the lower levels of my heaven where coolness is at your grasp but you can only wift my fumes of back in the day experience and date cataloging skills. Watch in awe as I show you what I thought was cool and you should think it's cool too.

Let's not talk about substance of the band. Let's talk about how bobby looked at peter when jan walked in on them. Lets talk about that night at the bar when supposedly larry shit in jacks shoe and chrissy overheard it at the regal beagle and thought they were smuggling aliens over the border to vote in the primary. No one wants to hear about what key a chord progession was or how someone compares (aside from one always being god) to another musician specifically speaking on technical ability alone. Ignoring, musical style, political slant, annoying costumes and other detractors from music, technical ability is not subjective like how "killer" someone is or how "great" of a guitarist they are. Some people have incredible talents like the idiots in the 90's with the whole guitar virtuoso plague. They are savants and prodigies on their axe but who listens to them? Other guitar players is about it... the music is empty and insulting, despite the guitarwork being incredibly complex and physically demanding. How can that be? How can you take a porsche 959 and drive it 1000 feet into a brick wall at full speed? Then there are those who's techiniqe and physicall feats on the frets can be mimicked by any pawn shop visitor on an out of tune stolen stratocastor or on a child's untunable blue plastic acoustic?

Lastly, I am so important to me that part of me gets off on ignoring me as well. Some of my intruders cannot stand to be ignored and it will drive most trolls away. I however am so deadicated to being the mouth piece of the fans of this band that I will revel in my ignored posts as proof that someone knows my name and knows to ignore me. But eventually I will come up with a snappy subject line and quickly I will be the man again. I can always change my name if that doesn't work. Now where did I write down all those passwords?

So remember where you heard that show, in my world. You all know me, I have different names. Sometimes I was the jock at the party in high school who told you your music sucked and got everyone to laugh. I was the guy behind the bar with the fake blow. I was the email from yesterday promising you a bigger penis. I was the guy you caught out of the middle of your eye smirking at you from across the room with a cheshire cat grin and my eyes on your girlfriends ass. I am the the one who claims to be open minded but won't listen for one second to what anyone else has to say. I am the smiling preppie chick who is smoking the weed you sold her older brother's friend that smiles at you and then jokes about how much of a loser you are when you leave. I am the scumbag who decided that girl passed out at the party was sexy enough. But the question is not who am I? It is, why am I me? And that is one thing even I do not know. If you were me that is...

Just Something to think about.

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Poster: Sumanguru Gyra Jones Date: Feb 16, 2008 5:14pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Dear NoiseCollector,

I heard Marsha and Jan had a lesbian thing going on back in the day. And Dad was a flamer. Peter is now hooked up with a twenty-something spoiled rotten model and splattering his personal problems all over E television for $$$. Oh yea, Mom was dry humping Greg. Nothing is known of the little ones.

Peace2U
Sumanguru

I'm a bad typist so there will be a revision notice below here in a moment.

This post was modified by Sumanguru Gyra Jones on 2008-02-17 01:14:47

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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 16, 2008 5:18pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

No problem. How's Florida? just don't feed them...

http://www.archive.org/details/dontfeedthetrolls

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Poster: Sumanguru Gyra Jones Date: Feb 16, 2008 5:26pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

I'm watching the bottom fall out of the Western World here in SW Florida. I need to buy a 12 guage semi automatic and stock up on 30 shot. I like to fill the air will lots of lethal lead when I'm defending my rented space. Starving realators and retirees are no match for me. I'll take em all out.

The police paid a visit to my Cuban neighbors yesterday. No flashing lights. Just a line up of ma and pa and the kids and their fucking cats in the yard. Probably just a shake down.

Peace2U
Sumanguru

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Poster: whirlwind dreamer 65-95 Date: Feb 16, 2008 6:19pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

sumanguru hey bro i;m in sw florida!!! the cape coral!!!

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Poster: Sumanguru Gyra Jones Date: Feb 16, 2008 8:03pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Did I say SW Florida? I meant SW Texas. Cacti and dirt. No capes whatsoever.

By the way... how did I end up in a GratefulDead Forum of all places?

Box of Rain???
Truckin???
American Beauty???

Maybe it was SW Indiana. I vaguely recall something about Hoosiers and a strip club.

Peace2U
Sumanguru



This post was modified by Sumanguru Gyra Jones on 2008-02-17 04:03:06

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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 16, 2008 7:59pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

My fungi and cacti are allies...

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Poster: Sumanguru Gyra Jones Date: Feb 16, 2008 8:04pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Keep your fungi between your toes, partner.

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Feb 16, 2008 9:51am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

clearly, suicide is YOUR only option. opt for it already.

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Poster: jerkwaterdan Date: Feb 17, 2008 10:27pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! I used to live in a room full of mirrors

Reading this post reminds me of the lyrics to a Jimi Hendrix song:

"I used to live in a room full of mirrors
and all I could see was me"

Room Full Of Mirrors

This post was modified by jerkwaterdan on 2008-02-18 06:27:24

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Poster: dedmon Date: Feb 19, 2008 12:16am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! I used to live in a room full of mirrors

I prefer castles made of sand. did the dead do any hendrix covers? did hendrix do any dead covers? was hendrix really aarons dad? man, I really miss the shows. I went on tour in the 80's for close to four years and out of all those shows I cant recall them playing any hendrix covers. although I did witness a version of space where jerry went into the melody from third stone from the sun. what a trip that was.

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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 21, 2008 9:21am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Hendrix reference executed perfectly, well done




This post was modified by NoiseCollector on 2008-02-21 17:21:25

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Poster: Solo Head Date: Feb 16, 2008 10:53am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

You know this guy was a stagejumper at one time or another.

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Poster: Kryssy Fields Date: Feb 16, 2008 3:37pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

NOISECOLLECTOR, need your help with some noise additives >
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3NkS7ve7Ro

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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 16, 2008 4:08pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzl9uza6GGM

It is time to go to the zoo...

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Poster: Kryssy Fields Date: Feb 16, 2008 11:32pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

NOW THERE IS ANOTHER REASON NOT TO TAKE THE KIDS.

Lift off >

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Poster: high flow Date: Feb 16, 2008 12:08pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Man, that was THE WORST American Express commercial I've ever seen!

I still don't know who the card-holder is!!!

They left out the "chicka-chicka-chicka-chicka" part where Karl Malden or Jerry Seinfeld's name scrolls across the credit card.

SHIT!

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Feb 16, 2008 10:01am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Maybe you should stay with yo mama
She could do your laundry n cook for you
Maybe you should stay with yo mama
Youre really kinda stupid n ugly too

(verse repeats)

You aint really made for bein out in the street
Aint much hope for a fool like you
cause if you play the game, you will get beat

Maybe you should stay with yo mama
She could do your laundry n cook for you
Maybe you should stay with yo mama
Youre really kinda stupid n ugly too
And
You should never smoke in pajamas
You might start a fire n burn yer face
Maybe youll return to managua
You could go unnoticed in such a place

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Poster: dedmon Date: Feb 16, 2008 12:48pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

yoyoyoyoyoyo...check it...

jerry was a beeyotch and so are you
and your rhyme is weak as a girly jew
you talk about momz cuz yours is a man
her name was jerry and her merry band
now she is dead and we are grateful
you got nothing to bring to the table
and cant make a song to retaliate
so go masturbate to a bootleg tape
yeeeaaah booooooooy!!!

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Feb 17, 2008 8:52am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

another noisecollectingpileofshit heard from....

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Poster: Telephone Toughguy Date: Feb 17, 2008 9:46am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

Looks like someone will need to create a fake army to fight the innocent bystanders rapidly turning public opinion against you for the sole purpose of advertising a song.

Enjoy your 15 minutes!

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Poster: ghostofghostofrbnw Date: Feb 17, 2008 3:03pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

i get it.....you are a pedophile priest! quite an accomplishment.

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Poster: whirlwind dreamer 65-95 Date: Feb 16, 2008 5:08pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

nice zappa touch ghost!!! i dig it!!! hi five for ghost!!!

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Poster: William Tell Date: Feb 17, 2008 4:05pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: changed the subject line just for you

Whoa....and you say I have a problem with "over-writing"? Hmm, also think that TT and the rest of you need to re-evaluate the mutual support group approach to posting...

But, to each his own.

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Poster: Administrator, Curator, or StaffNoiseCollector Date: Feb 17, 2008 5:49pm
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: changed the subject line just for you

Good call and point well taken... it was all for the new song though and I had to let off some steam.

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Poster: stratocaster Date: Feb 16, 2008 10:03am
Forum: GratefulDead Subject: Re: Everyone look at me! And tell me, who am I?

I appreciate the crooked diatribes as much as the next guy but limit it to 2 or 3 paragraphs next time...